I Litter (v) (garbage – litter, not giving birth to 7 pups)

Not most of the times but, occasionally when I have been carrying a coffee cup for too long without coming across a dustbin. Also i stuff toffee wrappers and other bits into cracks of buildings and crevices between tables.

Yesterday we had an impromptu plan of going to Mocha, a nearby cafe. We picked a third friend working late in his lab, tripling on a kinetic scooter. This third guy had a bag of garbage which he had to dispose. We missed a dustbin on the way and were soon out of campus. Now chances of finding a dustbin were almost nil. So I took the bag and projected it to a point close to a nallah. Out of nowhere came these supergirl anTGarbageGirl and Superbroom and kicked the shit out of me.

anTGarbageGirl: Go and pick it up at once. seething with rage
me: compiling error…what where who…wtf?????
Superbroom: pick it up and put it in a dustbin eyes spewing fire

Now I could have picked the easier and funnier ways out….

me: Oh..I am really sorry, i’ll never repeat this.
Then go, pick the bag go inside the campus and throw it into a dustbin.

Why did’nt i do it?
Because apologies are meant to be said when you realize your mistake. But in my case there was no realisation. I already knew that littering is bad before throwing the bag.

Or I could have used a minutely logical excuse like …

me:Oh we are not throwing it, it’s too important to be thrown. It has got my SSC certificates. I am just keeping it here for safety, and when we return I will take it back.

Or I could have just keep my mouth shut and done a amitabh style baraat naach.

What I did was making lame excuses with a ruffian’s tone in my voice. But the supergirls were hard nuts, even my gunda from Bihar accent did’nt budge them. Meanwhile my friend who was behind me (the actual master of the bag) went in a jiffy picked up the bag and ran into the campus to find a dustbin.

I did’nt even see him go. Here I am standing having a verbal duel with two supergirls, being a total villain, and my sidekick dumps me and goes to find a dustbin.

When they saw him go picking up, they stopped mid-sentence and dug their spurs into the autodrivers back. I was like, “WTF??” and when I turned back I realized what had happened. I am not speaking to him for two days :–X .

Next post would be a justification of my actions. Or I’ll just forget the whole episode as one of my ego trips. I hope my attempts at humour have at least partially covered-up my “atrocious” act.

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