Archive for March, 2006

Wardrobe Malfunction Malattraction

Friday, March 31st, 2006

Yes I know you want to see it. Here they are.

Happy, you must be, like everyone, from the media to the masses. Everyone likes to see someone (or shall we say something) else slip, and what better then a model.
A professional who uses his/her body.
Then why do people and the law prosecute a guy who sells MMS clips on ebay. Because it is illegal? The newspapers are smarter, as they get away with it, by placing appropriate blocks of black.

Is the actual “thing” more shameful than the whole episode?

People’s reactions over the episode are being published. And the discussion is definitely not about the printability of the matter.

Some thing the models are actually attention mongers. Maybe some of them are. But then the whole thing is even more pathetic, as they have made puppets out of media and the people.

And even from a commercial point of view, one of the newspapers can position itself as Moral, by not printing it. And publicising that fact (of not printing it).

man and the fish

Tuesday, March 28th, 2006

This is a film about a man and a fish.
This is a film about a dramatic relationship between a man and a fish.
The man stands between life and death.
The man thinks.
The horse thinks.
The sheep thinks.
The dog thinks.
The fish doesn’t think.
The fish is mute, expresionless, the fish doesn’t think,
because it knows…everything.

Film soundtracks are a great way of discovering new music. And some not so famous movies have awesome music. The lines above are from the soundtrack of Arizona Dreams. Composed by Goran Bregovic, and sung by Iggy Pop. “Tv screen”, “In the death car” and “dreams” are just awesome. You can download some of these using audio search engines like alltheweb.com and singingfish.com.

Thank you friends, teachers, coutrymen, plants, animals, …….a long list

Sunday, March 26th, 2006

DNA has published one of my short stories in it’s suplement ‘ME’. (it’s on the 42 page:)You may have read it on this blog here. The editor Ms. Sathya Saran had asked me if I could make the story longer. I had a tough time doing that without messing it. But I think I managed. The old one is still here, and the version 2.O can be read below the dotted line. And thanks for all the support. And all you ppl get a treat for your suggestions :).

Update: Forgot to mention rahul, who encouraged me to send my story.
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Round and round they went with the beats. The inner
circle moved clockwise, the outer one in the opposite
direction. It was a whir of every colour between red
and yellow.

Each had their favourite partner. And when that one
came, there would be an added twinkle in the eye and a
coquettish smile. The victim would then rush through
rest of the players to get back to her.

It was the ninth day of navratri. Lovers and would be
lovers where playing the celestial dance of garba, in
the footsteps of Lord Krishna and his gopis.

She felt thirsty. Moving out of the two circles,
narrowly avoiding dandiya sticks, she waved her hands
to grab his attention. She reminded herself to punch
him for giving “that” smile to the girl in the purple,
backless choli.

They had met hardly a month ago and of all places on
the mud flats of Sewri. The flamingoes had come by
their hundreds. And both of them were part of the BNHS
birdwatching trip. She was interested in nature from
her childhood. Her parents, especially her poor mother
had endured everything from tree snakes to spiders in
matchboxes.

He was hardly listening to the guide who was telling
them about the special type of soil and climate of the
region. He kept stealing glances. He tried to remember
everything he had ever seen on the national geographic
about flamingoes. So that he could say something
intelligent to her, start the conversation. It took
him totally by surprise when she said to him, “ So
beautiful, aren’t they?”.

Something made the many birds to take off together, a
sea of pink. While they were smiling at the sight, a
shower of pink feathers greeted them.

Their story which had started with the blessing of the
flamingoes, used other newer technologies to gather
heat. Yahoo chats and phone calls led to coffee shop
trips. And then the festival season came.

And here he was walking towards her thinking of
excuses. He had seen the speck of jealous anger in her
eyes. Her anger vanished the moment he went and
grabbed her hand, pressing it. His eyes said many
things. The dancing had not raised her heartbeats as
his eyes did. They ran out of the pandaal, and into
the parking lot. They didn’t speak. Speech was
redundant. The only apprehensions were about what
extent the other would go.

The festival does it to you. It’s as if all the cement
factories in the world had start spewing pheromones
instead of the usual smoke. Thankfully the cultural
pollution control concentrated their efforts on the
western pollutants namely Valentine’s effluents.

Everything was a blur after that. Time was getting
stuck and accelerating like a learning driver. The
ghagra stuck in the door. The kisses soon after. The
knots of the choli, which gave him some hard time.
The fumblings and the shy hands.

She stopped him. No it is not safe, she said. But he
was well prepared. Out came a small white packet. She
relented.

And exactly after 3mins and 40sec I swam into this
world. With millions of other competitors. But I
coud’nt see any of them. I was at the front. But what
was this white hurdle. The old man hadn’t said
anything about it in the dressing room. But I saw this
small hole, light coming out. I slithered out, with
some effort.

The target was soon in sight.

I became me.

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holi hungama

Friday, March 17th, 2006

This time Holi reset my body clock. I used to sleep at 6am till around 2-3 in the afternoon. Which ate up all my day. So on holi day i decided to dayout.

First to hostel to my wingmates.
Narrowly avoided being thrown into muddy waters.
Then to batchmates who live nearby.
Narrowly avoided having an “azo dye dant manjan”.

Then 5 of us headed to water kingdom.
Pondy, rane, uppoo, gajju and I.
A long journey later,
(auto to andheri, train to malad, auto to marve beach, ferry to water kingdom)
in which we narrowly avoided being capsized by a killer whale, we reached the place.

Lots of lovey dovey couples and gujju families.

sidenote: T-shirt and slacks, should be banned at amusement parks.

In the mass of people we lost sight of uppoo and rane. They had not one Re between them and we had the key to the locker. Adrenaline from the rides kept them alive till evening when we found them.

I want to work for esselworld, for the post of “Ride Namer”, that is naming rides.
Boggle Bogie, chumunga vumunga, dhoondoo - lundoo, Jalebi Spin, etc..etc..
Now that would be an exciting job.

God of elfwood disappoints his subjects

Monday, March 13th, 2006

Whatsup with me. I had another one of those filmi dreams. This time it was a fantasy, in archaic english.


Two little elves are sitting in the hollow of a tree. When suddenly the tree becomes a tree man. The elves are are not worried because this is not new for them. The tree man addresses them, “Elves prepare to die!”.

Now as everyone knows elves are “amar” and there is nothing which could kill them. So the elves start laughing at the treeman’s words.

Now furious, the tree man’s voice booms, “you little thimblings, you think I am an old barky tree, don’t you. I defeated the GOd of Elfwood. And that fearful little thing that you call your GOD, wept and cried, begging for his life.”

sidenote: in elfwood the gods can die, they are not “amar”.

Tree man: “Infact he traded his life in exchange of all the elves….HA HA HA HA…”

Now realizing the tragedy of the situation, one of the elves steps forward, “Take me first , Oh tree GOD. Because I can’t see my friend die. I’d rather go first.”

But then something miraculous happens, the other elf begins to transform. Half his body begins covering with armour, and his right hand changes into something really deadly. He roars, “Not so fast, O tree GOD, half my body maybe dung to you, but the other half can take you down. This is a armour worn by great human king Saladin. I could only get half of it, but even that is enough for you.”

And his deadly right hand begins to elongate and enlarge towards the neck of the tree god.

And then i wake up.